Guy, On New-Agey Woman Going On About 'Creating Your Own Reality'

"Looks like she pictured herself surrounded by the makeup she wanted to achieve."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

At 16th And Mission BART (Dedicated To John Hodgman)

Litle Girl: "Mom, since we're in San Francisco today, are we going to see some real HOBOS today?"
Mom: "Hobos! I was once a hobo!"
Little Girl: "Mom! No you weren't!"
Mom: "Yes I was! I was homeless and lived in Golden Gate park from the age of 14 to 19."
Little Girl: (voice shakes) "No you weren't! You weren't a hobo!"
Mom: "Yes I was, I was a hobo. Don't judge your own kind! Judge and be judged."

OVERHEARD BY SD

Old Guy In Pub

"I knew a Japanese bloke once. He changed his name to Smith. Mind you, he still looked Japanese."

OVERHEARD BY O.B.

Overheard In An Employment Office, Or Perhaps On Vaudeville

Official: "What experience do you have?"
Jobseeker: "I worked for 30 years on a poultry farm, killing chickens."
Official: "Have you done anything else?"
Jobseeker: "I killed turkeys."

OVERHEARD BY O.B.

Meta Post: Your 'Overheard Lines' Host, To Friend, On Why There've Been No Updates Lately

"Goddamn iPods are ruining everything. No one talks any more!"

SAID BY TIM

She Must Be In A Good Union

Loud Girl In Outdoor Bar: "My vagina's not working tonight."

OVERHEARD BY KATIE

Alabamians At Breakfast

"They don't serve grits everywhere. We took a tour with our church group and we had to take along our own grits."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Drunk Friends In College Bar District

Girl: "There's the cops. Maybe if we did something they'd give us a ride."
Guy: "Yeah, but it wouldn't be to where we want to go."

OVERHEARD BY KATIE

Canadians In Ecuador

4-year-old: "Mommy, that girl speaks English!"
Mother: "Yes, she does."
4-year-old: "But nobody here speaks English. Does she really speak English?"
Mother: "Of course she speaks English! She's white!"

OVERHEARD BY KATIE

Better-Safe-Than-Sorry Woman In Line For Morning Coffee

"So Frankenstein is still dead, right?"

OVERHEARD BY SARAH

When Insurance Agents Get All 'Snap!'

"Why you looking at me like I'm 'co-pay poor'?"

OVERHEARD BY MK