And What's With All That 'Smelling Good' And 'Looking Pretty'? What Are They Trying To Prove?

Guy: "I'm not into sunflowers right now. They're so....slouchy."

OVERHEARD BY HEATHER

Overheard Lines Is On Vacation For A Week

"Back on the 29th. Thanks for reading, and we'll see you then!"

WRITTEN BY TIM

Although, In Oklahoma, It'd Qualify

Customer: "I'm looking for an inspirational book similar to 'Chicken Soup for the Soul'."
Salesperson: "Well, those 'Chicken Soup' books are really popular. You sure you don't want to look at those?"
Customer: "No thank you, I'm buying for my friend and she's a vegetarian."

OVERHEARD BY KATHERINE

Worse Than Yelling 'Fire'

Overheard in a theater while waiting for the play to begin:
Woman 1: "I heard she's coming back to Desperate Housewives this season."
Woman 2: "Who? Britney Spears?"

OVERHEARD BY ANDERS

Man At Computer (Hopefully Not A Government Computer)

"People are exploding and I don't know why. (mutters to himself) That's never a good thing."

OVERHEARD BY TASNICKER

Girl Unclear On The Concept Of 'Funny'

"I asked her where they were eating and she said, 'I don't know, she never told me.' It was funny."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Students Divvying Up Jobs

Student 1: "Okay, so we need someone to do a biographical sketch."
Student 2: (points to another student) "You look like you can draw."

OVERHEARD BY TRAVIS

I Think I Want To Spend The Rest Of My Life Hanging Out In O.B.'s Pub

A middle-aged couple are sitting in the pub, eating breakfast, when the fire alarm goes off. Told it's a false alarm, the man says to the woman:

"Thank God for that. I thought your mother had just come in."

OVERHEARD BY O.B.

Woman Exiting Four-And-A-Half-Hour Meeting

"This morning before the meeting, I didn't know what it was supposed to be about. Now, after the meeting...I don't know what it was supposed to be about."

OVERHEARD BY CLAIRE

This Might Be A Little, You Know...

Girl: "I want a complicated man."
Guy: "I'm complicated."
Girl: "You must not be that complicated if you have to tell me you're complicated."
Guy: "But I'm complicated enough that you didn't know I was complicated."

OVERHEARD BY PSYGUY

Life Is A Joke (Especially In The Pubs O.B. Hangs Out In)

A man with a backpack walks into the pub. They chat to a regular at the bar:
Regular: "Are you OK? I noticed you were limping when you came in."
Backpacker: "My leg does ache a bit."
Regular: "Perhaps I can help. I'm a physiotherapist."
Backpacker: "Pity you're not a carpenter. It's a wooden leg."

OVERHEARD BY O.B.

Oklahoman Who's Sensitive To His Vegetarian Guests

"Well, we're about to watch the OU game, and we're going to cook buffalo steaks, and some chicken for people who don't eat meat."

OVERHEARD BY MK

The Problem With Procrastination

Woman 1: "I'm not a dilletante; I'm serendipitous. ...I should embroider that on a pillow."
Woman 2: "Yeah, but you'd only get about halfway done."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Next Week On Journeyman

Mother and Daughter Listen To The Radio For A While. Then:
Daughter: "You know this isn't really happening. This is tomorrow morning's news."
Mom: "Why do you say that?"
Daughter: "Because I turned it to AM."

OVERHEARD BY MISSY

Overheard And Overseen At A Swimming Pool

Four-Year-Old, Yanking Up Her Mother's Bikini Top: "PEEK - A - BOOB!"

OVERHEARD BY ALICIA

'Depends. Are You An Elephant?'

"If you were pregnant in February 2008, would you be due in 2008?"

OVERHEARD BY MK