NOT Overheard At Chico's

"Maybe this is what strippers wear..."

OVERHEARD BY TASNICKER

Take Your Daughter To Work And Watch Her Leave Day

Daughter: "I'm going over to the library across the street so I can send you a message on facebook."
Mom: "Why don't you just send me a facebook message from the computer that you're sitting at right now?"
Daughter: "I can't send you a message from here. I'm sitting in the room right next to you!"
Mom: "So why don't you just TALK to me?"
Daughter: "Because I want to message you! I'm going to the library."

OVERHEARD BY MELISSA

'And I Can Program It To Wake Me Up For Work. If I Had A Job.'

"You know what's neat about our coffee pot? It could go camping. I mean, if we ever went."

OVERHEARD BY TASNICKER

Starbucks Baristas Are Trained To Be Upbeat And Friendly

Barista: "So what are you doing today?"
Woman: "Going to a funeral."
Barista: "Oh, that should be fun!"

OVERHEARD BY JULIE

Two Blokes Discussing 'Soccer' In A Lincoln, UK, Pub

Bloke 1: "I hear England's new coach is going to bar wives and girlfriends from the hotel before matches."
Bloke 2: "So, they'll be even bigger wankers than they are now."

OVERHEARD BY O.B.

'Mmm, Girl, I See It Right There On Your Hips, Heyyyy"

Woman: "I wonder if I have as much chocolate on me as I think I have."

OVERHEARD BY TASNICKER

Guy On The Brink Of A Realization

"Whenever I go in a room, all you ladies go out."

OVERHEARD BY BONNIE

Why IT Guys Hate Everyone Else In The World

User: "Every time I type something it comes out in all capital letters. Do you have a manual for the keyboard?"
IT Guy: "Have you tried the CAPS LOCK key?"

OVERHEARD BY ADRIAN

Guy Discussing His Vacation Plans

"I believe in signs, dude. I took a dump and it was totally shaped like a boot. I'm going to Italy."

OVERHEARD BY ALICIA

Overheard Lines Is On A Four-Day Holiday

"Back on Tuesday the 8th. Have an independent weekend."

SAID BY TIM

Probably Not The Girl In The Last Post

"I got a dress with a higher neckline and when I got the pictures back I looked like a 40 year old soccer mom! My mom said she liked it and all my other dresses look a little slutty. But I don't care if my tits fall in the salad, I'm not wearing that soccer mom dress again!"

OVERHEARD BY WHURLEY

'Depends What The Meaning Of "Big" Is'

"No, the 32 double-A is just too big."

OVERHEARD BY PATRICIA

After A Near-Fatality When A Child Fell Into A Hole Dug By Geologists

"Well, if those gynecologists hadn't left that hole uncovered...."

OVERHEARD BY PATRICIA