3-Year-Old In High Chair At Starbucks

"I like coffee!"

OVERHEARD BY EVAN

Man Yelling From Apartment Window To Blonde-Haired Person Crossing Street At Columbus And Kearney

"Attention blonde-haired people that are walking across the street: I am bringing sexy back."

OVERHEARD BY INGRID

Les Pauvres Enfants!

Girl 1: "So Jane got a job teaching music in French."
Girl 2: "That's great."
Girl 3: "She doesn't know any music.... Or French."

OVERHEARD BY EVAN

Wisest Girl Ever, To Her Brother

"You know what makes you just like everyone else? You think you're special."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Gen X And Gen Y Bookstore Employees Showing Their Age

Guy: "I used to love the Berenstain Bears. Then they betrayed me! My mom brought home 'The Berenstain Bears And Too Much TV' and I knew that night, no Sheriff Lobo."
Girl: "What the hell are you talking about?"
Guy: "Things from way before you were born, I guess."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Woman At End Of Play Finally Cluing In To The Process

"Oh my God! Someone wrote that!"

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Reductive Tourist Walking Towards Lincoln Memorial

"That's the thing on the back of the penny!"

OVERHEARD BY AMY

Guy To Woman Wondering If Her Rented Mansion Has All The Amenities

"If they have a Miró on the wall, they probably have purified water."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Mother Who Doesn't Like Labels, To Child At Zoo

"We came here to see animals, not ducks!"

OVERHEARD BY JIM

Guy Talking To Buddy As They Wait For Shopping Girlfriends

"Why can't they put regular rings on their toes?"

OVERHEARD BY KELLEY

Exchange In A Spanish Class (And Now Everyone Knows The Answer)

Teacher: "How was your weekend?"
Student: "Como se dice 'gastrointestinal'?"

OVERHEARD BY CLARK

5-Year-Old Who Had Accident In Ocean, After Adult Tried To Console Her By Confessing To Doing The Same When Younger

"Did YOUR butt smell when you pooped your pants?"

OVERHEARD BY PRIYA

Gay Guy On Girls Who Think They're Relating

Gay Guy: "You know the Horsehoe isn't a gay bar, right?"
Straight Guy: "I know. Let's just go anyway."
Gay Guy: "Okay, but if one more bitch asks me if I like her shoes...."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Obvious Woman To Random Stranger On MUNI

"I like fall clothes because I like sweaters!"

OVERHEARD BY ANNA

Rich American Woman On Cheap Mexican Hamburgers

"I took one bite and it was so good I went back and ordered two more for my dogs."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Kid On The Wonder Of Dogs Licking Themselves

"He licks his own butt! It's like carrying candy."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Yuppie Mom Walking In Park With Fussy 5-Year-Old

"Well, you're not listening to me, so I'm not sharing any more latte."

OVERHEARD BY KELLEY