'And That Tall Animal With The Really Long Neck Is A Squirrel'

Overheard in the bathroom at the zoo:
Daughter: "Mommy, who is George Washington?"
Mommy: "Umm, he was like the 24th president or something."

OVERHEARD BY ERIN

'You Can't Miss It. It's, You Know, Big And...Well, You Know'

Guy: "Did you see a big white van anywhere? We parked it 3 hours ago, got drunk, and now we can't find it."

OVERHEARD BY EVAN

95-Year-Old On Her New Pacemaker

Doctor: "Now the batteries are only good for six years...."
Woman: "Six years! I'll be 101! I'll be dead by then; you can have the batteries back!"

OVERHEARD BY SARAH

Two Guys Walking Past Church In Outer Richmond

Guy 1: "That's a big fucking church."
Guy 2: "God's a big fucking guy."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Co-Workers Discussing Sibling Rivalry After The Birth Of A New Baby

Woman: "How's the dog?"
Man: "He's okay. But his head's hanging a little lower."

OVERHEARD BY MK

Overheard Near Crocker Galleria (But Coulda Been Anywhere Downtown, Really)

"Man, there's DNA all over the streets!"

OVERHEARD BY JESSICA

Guy On MUNI Who Trusts No One

"You can't trust a white woman over 25. Even if they're white Asians. Or white Hispanics."

OVERHEARD BY TIM

Then What Did She Mean?

Woman On Cellphone: "Could you let me talk to Nick? I don't call his phone directly because he's too hot; he's too hot; he's too hot. No, I don't mean hot as in good-looking; I mean he's too hot!"

OVERHEARD BY KATIE